EXCUSE ME, YOUR HOUSE IS SHOWING
On a scale of 1 to ridiculous, trying to show your house to sell, when you have two dogs and two toddlers is giraffe. What, that doesn’t make any sense? Yeah, neither does saying “please stop licking the couch with a mouth full of popsicle” for the fourth time in a row, but this is my life now. Let me start by saying that my family is incredibly blessed. We are moving from our big beautiful home, into another big beautiful home and every day I pinch myself (or rather my kids do that) just to make sure I’m not dreaming. No part of this is me complaining, but attempting to clean and organize at the level you need to while your house is on the market, with a house full of squirrelly children is like brushing your teeth while eating a box of Oreos.
The only time my kids are not making a mess, is when they are restrained in their car seats or sleeping. My threshold for what I used to consider chaotic, would now be a welcomed trip to the spa, as this process has quickly become my 5th child. On the plus side, I’m happy to report I’ve reached a new level of responsible adult, I now have to make my bed daily, something I haven’t done since my allowance depended on it. My to-do list starts with not letting my kids wipe their snot on the white towels and ends with picking up doggie landmines in the backyard. To make matters even more challenging, my youngest is in the "Mama" stage so anytime I even attempt to do anything resembling productivity it looks exactly like this...
I also need to paint the picture of our two dogs, remember them? Don’t worry, I forgot too until I realized they would bark incessantly at any visitors taking a tour and somehow a yapping dog doesn’t exactly translate to “welcome to your new home”. They are our original babies, but boy did we drop the ball on training them properly. Our Cocker Spaniel is so cute that if she were to run away, someone would definitely keep her and our Beagle just wants to go wherever there is food (one of Charlotte’s first sentences was “Lola is fat”). Anytime there is a gate or door open they have escaped out of here faster than you can say, What is the opposite of Homeward Bound? Our amazing neighbor is letting us keep them in her backyard during showings, otherwise I would have “accidentally” left our front door open the night Lola decided to eat an entire lasagna while standing on our kitchen table.
We haven’t even begun to enter the world of packing, and pulling things out of boxes is actually one of my kid’s favorite activities, so stay tuned for that part of our epic adventure. I hope I continue to find humor and strength in-between my sessions of curling up in the fetal position in our perfectly color coordinated walk-in closet.
