The Finale
Barbara’s level of enthusiasm towards Madison, is how we all felt about her son’s season of The Bachelor.
Women Tell All
Peter doesn’t actually answer any of the hard-hitting questions and hides behind his, “Hey, I’m not perfect” excuse like it’s an acceptable replacement phrase for being uninteresting--when his entire job is to be interesting.
Fantasy Suites
The girls rendezvous back in their shared suite, where they try not to make eye contact with each other or their faces will reveal the truth that would quickly send Madi and her oddly symmetrical eyelashes back home to bible study.
Hometowns
It is safe to assume that after this latest episode, anyone that was still rooting for Peter to find love has now left the building and is at an eyewash station, because we are now bleeding from the eyes after 2 hours of solid hometown torture.
Week 7
Now that the girls are “whindeling” down to the week before hometowns, it’s time to get serious. Which means it would be helpful to spend some alone time with the guy who is going to potentially meet your parents as your “boyfriend”.
Week 5 & 6
I think the producers should have first invested money in Peter going on a solo ice fishing trip where they could have witnessed his internal turmoil over which type of bait to use and his diving in to rescue a once released northern pike and then his trepidation over a worm that may or may not be ready for its emotional journey down the metaphorical hole in the ice.
Week 4 Recap
We open this episode with a bunch of pampered women trying to get excited about “traveling the world” starting with Cleveland, Ohio. Victoria F. gets the first one-on-one and Peter takes them flying, because that’s not getting old at all, and then they go to an amusement park.
Week 3 Recap
Peter, Peter, Peter. This is a friendly reminder it is WEEK 3 and if you are struggling over your decision to send home a two-faced pageant girl, this is going to be a looooong season. But let’s go back.
Week 2 Recap
Thankfully Monday marked the last time we ever have to hear Hannah B talk about her heart. All you need to take away from Peter and the Beast’s final interaction is that they both signed iron-clad contracts with different shows, otherwise they would have flown off into the sunset together, faster than you could say where is the nearest windmill.
Week 1 Recap
Hold onto your seats folks, we are about to be riding high with love-taking-flight analogies this season. I will be your in-flight entertainment, however, I will not be providing you with an airsick bag--but I have a feeling, we are going to need one.
The Rundown
Without a fantasy league we would be forced to watch the 24th season of “The Bachelor” for it’s entertainment value alone. Now you can succumb to your guilty pleasure, while playing along at home.
Points from Fantasy Suites
Hannah Ann
Saying “I love you” to Peter - 30 points
Kissing Peter on the lips - 10 points
Crying on camera - must actually see moisture fall - 25 points
Accepting the Fantasy Suite - 75 points
Wildcard: First to compliment Peter's appearance - 40 points
Madison
Kissing Peter on the lips - 10 points
Crying on camera - must actually see moisture fall - 25 points
Refusing the Fantasy Suite - -75 points
Vanessa F.
Saying “I’m falling for you” to Peter or “I’m falling for him” to the camera - 20 points
Riding in a helicopter - 10 points
Kissing Peter on the lips - 10 points
Crying on camera - must actually see moisture fall - 25 points
Accepting the Fantasy Suite - 75 points
